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Because everyone loves a farce



Friday, December 31   1:49 PM

No longer a light source in dark rooms

Back from Hawaii. Or is it Hawai'i?





They write it both ways there. But what does the apostrophe really add? How else would an English-speaker pronounce two consecutive I's at the end of a word?

So, Hawaii. I'll be the first to admit that I don't get as excited about visiting exotic locales as the rest of my family. Hawaii had good weather, no bugs, warm water, and scenic vistas, but nothing to excite me intellectually.

So I brought some books and worked on my tan. It's fading fast, but it's nice to be less than pasty white. I read Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, a great sprawling work of fantasy (though some of the denouement seems rushed) that reads like a cross between Harry Potter and Jane Austen.

With footnotes. I love footnotes in fiction.

I also read Rabbit, Run, the first popular novel written in the present tense (if you believe Prof. Dintenfass). Meh. And when I'd finished that I bought a dated collection of science fiction novellas from a used bookstore for $1.

Budrys' "Rogue Moon," Sherred's "E for Effort," and Jack Vance's "The Moon Moth" were very good for very different reasons. "The Martian Way," which I'd read before, would be great if not for Asimov's insistence on calling the villainously manipulative Earth politician "Hilder."

Ah, vacation.





That's Akaka falls. Naturally we also did a lot of tourist stuff on the big island. Saw some old volcanoes, explored an old lava tube, boogie-boarded, went scuba diving near where Captain Cook died… I'll spare you the list and the pictures. I know that kind of thing can be tedious.





But here's a group shot, for anyone who doesn't know what we all look like.

This particular family vacation was notable for two reasons. First, it could be the last time we do something like this as a family; next year I'll be probably be off at grad school or working at some tiny paper.

And second, Matt's longtime (three years?) girlfriend Amy came with us.





Here's us playing gummy bear poker in the hotel room. It was good to have Amy along; this was the first time I'd spent any significant amount of time with the girl who'll eventually be my sister-in-law.

We actually have a lot in common too. Like all intelligent people, she loves Burger King's chicken sandwiches. And you can tell that she's anal-retentive and I'm obsessive-compulsive just by looking at our gummy bear organization.

(Aside: Gummy bear poker is just one of the crazy things they do at Matt's college, Michigan Tech. A marked improvement over our money-based poker, which usually degenerates into a pissing contest rather than an eating contest. I'm not sure that they're more creative than us Lawrentians, but those crazy U.P. kids certainly have more initiative.)

I felt bad for Matt and Amy, spending a sexually-frustrated week together in paradise. But it's their own fault if they never figured out a way to sneak off. That's one skill that I'm sure every long-term couple develops.

My sympathy doesn't extend very far, of course. Sure must be rough at the top…

One of the fringe benefits of a tropical vacation is the drinks. Matt can't and doesn't drink, but Amy and I had girlie-drinks every day she was there. And there was no ridicule! It was awesome!

Equally awesome: I have a bunch of trivia questions now. With my grad school applications in the mail, I had the luxury of brainstorming. I even have what may be a decent super garruda.

If I can find the answer. God.

My family got along surprisingly well this time. I didn't go to Xmas mass, which probably irritated my parents. But otherwise I was on my best behavior, not taking anything too seriously.

I'm usually annoyed with someone or other a few days into any family vacation, but I only got frustrated once, when my exhausted father insisted on driving us home through the freezing rain instead of turning over the wheel to Matt.

I'm not planning on spending much time here at home. I'm going to the Cities tonight for New Year's (no clue what that'll be like) and I'm driving Ben and his girlfriend back to Lawrence tomorrow afternoon. I supposed I'd better get re-packed if I'm going to be out of here on time.

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